Leadership Mantras for Challenging Moments
As leaders, we dedicate hours to learning how to navigate every situation with grace and effectiveness. But when we’re in the middle of a tough moment, there’s no “pause” button to review notes and find the perfect response. So, I’ve collected a set of “mantras” that help keep me grounded. Whilst they might not be written in LED on a wall (yet), these simple guiding principles have been invaluable, and I hope they’ll work for you too.
You Only Have to Do Something for the First Time Once
Taking on something new can be nerve-wracking — whether it’s a presentation, a tough conversation, or even trying out a new gym. The fear of the unknown often holds us back, and we can shy away from opportunities for growth. But here’s the thing: after you do it once, it’s no longer new, and the fear starts to shrink. The next time, it gets a little easier. This reminder helps me take the plunge and conquer my fears one step at a time.
It’s Nice to Be Nice, But It’s Essential to Be Kind
I first came across this idea in Radical Candor by Kim Scott, and it’s stuck with me ever since. Being “nice” often means avoiding discomfort, even if it means not being fully honest. But being kind, on the other hand, is about offering someone the truth with empathy and respect. Imagine this: someone has something in their teeth. It might feel awkward, but the kind thing to do is let them know so they can fix it. In the workplace, this is just as crucial. If a colleague’s behaviour is causing tension, they might not even be aware of the impact they’re having. Giving them honest feedback, even if it’s uncomfortable, can help them grow.
Feedback Is a Gift, You Don’t Have to Accept It
Feedback is essential for growth, and I’m a firm believer in giving and receiving it. But not all feedback is created equal. Sometimes, feedback lacks clarity, or it might ask you to act in a way that doesn’t align with your values or authentic self. In these cases, it’s okay to politely decline. However, before dismissing feedback, I recommend engaging in a conversation to better understand the details behind it. That way, you can decide whether it’s something worth acting on or if it’s just not relevant to your growth.
Perfection Is the Enemy of Good
We often get stuck in the pursuit of perfection, thinking it’s the only path to success. But perfection can actually hold us back. It’s better to produce something good and share it, than wait for it to be perfect. A “good enough” first draft or MVP lets you get real-world feedback, so you can iterate and improve faster. Perfection is an illusion; progress is where the real value lies.
Assume Ignorance, Not Malice
We’ve all heard “Assume positive intent,” which is helpful in many situations, but a former colleague offered me a thought-provoking challenge: Sometimes, assuming positive intent can allow microaggressions to go unaddressed. Instead, I’ve found it more productive to assume ignorance, not malice. This shift in mindset helps me approach frustrating situations with curiosity, rather than jumping to conclusions about someone’s intentions. For example, let’s say you’re the only woman in a meeting, and someone asks you to make tea. It’s easy to assume malice and build a negative story around their request. But let’s assume ignorance for a moment — maybe they don’t know where the kettle is, maybe they’re physically unable to get to the kitchen, maybe they’ve heard you make an amazing cup of tea — it opens up different possibilities. The key is to pause and question your assumptions. A response like, “Could you clarify why you think I should make the tea?” opens the door for a more thoughtful conversation.
I hope these mantras help you as much as they’ve helped me in my leadership journey. Leadership is messy, and there’s no one-size-fits-all solution, but having a few guiding principles can keep you grounded when things get tough.
